filipina married to kuwaiti guy unhappy

• hi,
  im Jinan i'm married to a kuwaiti guy and hopefully waiting for a baby boy end of this month. i am not happy with my relationship w/ my husband for many reasons, he lied to me about his 1st wife and 5 kids just to get me to marry him, and now i know everything about his 1st wife but she doesnt know anything about me and my coming son, he refuse to tell his family about me, and evertime i open up this topic he will start to loose his temper and starts telling me that i am Like an Ant slowly,slowly i will take everything away from his 1st family and i will be happy to tear them apart... i must admit he really adore his kids so much but i find it unfair when in the islamic law says: that he must have fair n' equal rights for each family right? specialy when he marry 2 wives. he doesnt even sleep in my "room" (not a flat/house) every night the whole week he just come to visit me 3-4 hours a day sometimes just 2 hours and then he will go home to his 1st wife who is living in a huge flat. recently he was applying for a housing loan from the goverment and he told me i dont have the right to appeal on this house niether my son in the furture... in the court he let me tell the judge thesame as an agreement between us and promised me that he will give me my own 3bedrooms flat... how is it fair when she has everything and i dont have anything? she has car,house,monthly allowance and most of all his whole family knows her, while i dont have all of that exept for the allowance. please can anybody can tell me what should i do? divorse issue? alot of times i ask for that but he always refuse... i dont know why he keeps on refusing when i ask him to divorse me, but also says many reasons just to do not stay with me even during weekends only...can anybody explain to me plsss... or is it because i am just a filipina and his 1st wife is a kuwaitia?

  22 Jan 2009, 10:52 Jinan

Replies

• U Poor Soul !!!

  You poor soul, I feel pity for you.
  
  This is the way Arabs & Muslims treat others (especially Foreigners) like Indians, Philippines, Sri Lankans & Bangladeshis.
  
  God's wrath will surely come on them.
  
  You should just walk out on him, go to your Embassy and ask their help to get a DIVORCE, then tell him to F-U-C-K O-F-F !!!
  
  That's what I would do...

  Toni Lobz 23 Feb 2009, 09:47 - Report

• Filipina Married to Kuwaiti

  Yes that's what you should do, he is just using you and taking you for granted if he really loves you he can introduce you to his family anyway it is acceptable in their society to have till four wives.
  
  If i were you find a way how to get rid of him and make your life I am sure you are not that desperate to have him.
  
  Be strong and if you cannot find a way to get rid of him go back to Philippines apply in the other middle east country but not in Kuwait.

  Kat 25 Mar 2009, 12:14 - Report

• stay with him

  Really sometimes people want more and more, i say take the money stay in kuwait where you have less problems, an income a house(shelter) and use him not the other way around, why do u want to go through the drama and openning, be the mistress watever, and with a baby coming along you will hopefully get more money for the child. you can run to phili. what do you get, a boy, at least you can leave the boy (but i dont think you want to do that).

  ahmad al gabambi 29 Mar 2009, 04:09 - Report

• Screw Him

  Obviously he doesnt love you, not even near to that. He's just using you. This is the typical behaviour of Arabs Men. It's sickening and disguisting. If i were you, i would leave him once the child is born but get divorce legally first.Let him take care and be fully responsible for the child. Screw him! you can start your life again somewhere else and learn from this experience.
  God Bless you and Good luck!

  J 13 Apr 2009, 07:43 - Report

• why did you marry him ?

  why did you marry him ? u r stupid

  LLOYD 20 Apr 2009, 01:13 - Report

• be strong 4 the sake of ur son

  just simple hold ur original marriage contract and the future birth certificate of ur coming son, do not show to him and never tell him anything about those important papers,,, coz those papers will give u the golden key to live happy with ur son,, go alone to the kuwait court without telling ur husband,,,in the court they will tell u what u will do and ask for ur right,100% u can have it,complain ur right coz if u will just like a stupid u will have zero,,dont let him to abuse ur personality we're all human being slave of god,,,good luck dear!!!!

  concern only 04 May 2009, 07:06 - Report

• it's me again

  whatever u wanna do as long as ur marriage is legal in kuwait, u can have ur answer through ur braveness,,take care always dear

  concern only 04 May 2009, 07:19 - Report

• it's me again

  why don't ya divorce him and marry his friend to make him jealous.

  ur mama 12 May 2009, 10:28 - Report

• RESPECT PLS

  HEY GUYS SHE NEEED OUR OPINION PLS. DON'T INSULT HER COZ UR NOT IN HER SITUATION,,

  CARE 16 May 2009, 11:47 - Report

• leave him he dont deserve you

  dear ive read your story... keep you future kid and go hme in our country... bare the kid in the philippines and come back.. they are stupid... leave your own life... stand upand be yourself. go tot he court and file a case against him, knowing you are legally married u can do something. dont be afraid u have your own right.

  abbieh 07 Jun 2009, 04:31 - Report

• Do not suspect ISLAM

  I’m a Muslim and I wanted to explain the matter from ISLAM point view.
  First of all what he did have nothing to do with ISLAM
  In ISLAM he have to inform both wives before marriage and get their acceptance (he didn’t inform the first wife)
  In ISLAM he have to be fair between both wives even in the smile. (of course he is not fair in flat, car,….)
  I agree of course he is using you to get his own pleasure. Somehow you accepted this coz I’m sure u had an idea before marriage about this (You said it you lied in the court). I don’t blame u I’m sure u had enough reasons to marry him.
  My advise to you the first thing u should do to get him admit his own son (get official birth certificate) coz this son have all the rights as other sons.
  Second you have to go to court to get divorce try to get the help of your embassy in that.
  I want to remind you of your rights, ISLAM give you your rights even after divorce. He have to give you place to live + monthly allowance + full fund for his son.
  I think you can remain in Kuwait coz you will be a mother of Kuwaiti (your son). I know it will be tough coz he will not give up and he will try to annoy you, but if you left Kuwait you will lose your & your son rights, so be strong and stay.
  TAKE CARE he may be will try not admit his son.
  
  Finally ISLAM in no way can accept what he is doing, not all Muslims or Arabs like this man. In all religions / nationalities there is bad people and good people. These kind of people do this even with other Arabs from poor countries like Egypt , Yemen,…They uses the seduction of money to use poor people.

  Muslim 16 Jun 2009, 08:34 - Report

• be strong

  I felt pity sa story mo.
  
  Islamically, your husband is doing major sin, coz it is clearly stated in th Holy Quran of being fair with wives. About his unfair treatment betwen you and his first wife, you have the right to speak out, and you also have the right to ask divorce. Its your right to demand your rights under islamic law.
  
  You have lots of options regarding your situation... like, what are the positive things that you will get by divorcing your husband or what do you think will happen with ur life and ur son after divorcing your husband. How long is your patience regarding his treatment towards you and your son?
  
  Since your marriage is legal, you can go to court and file case to get your rights, im sure Islamic shariah will sided you.
  
  Be strong, dont let him degraded you, being a wife you have a full right towards your husband, right to be love, right to respect, right to provide all your needs, right to know his family circle, atb.

  umm_mishal 17 Jun 2009, 02:12 - Report

• dear jinan

  realy iam so sorry when i red your story,iam ready to help you to solve your problem,first i will get job with good salary for you this the first step.pls contact me to my e-mail
  [email removed].

  Hany Alhassan 23 Jun 2009, 12:16 - Report

• Poor you

  you poor thing...you don't understand that you're the filipino shag that he's got on the side. Your not a wife. I bet you're not even married. I bet he is holding your passport and you've probably never seen an original marriage certificate (or if you have...it's probably made up) makes you iron/clean as well. If you've got a child, get that kid out of here and run as fast and far as you can. The more trouble you cause him in his "real" life, the more likely you'll end up deported (minus your child), or worse in a hole in the desert somewhere. Yes, my dear it is because you're a filipino. Wake up and smell the hommous. Get out before it's too late.

  Sorry for you 25 Jul 2009, 04:00 - Report

• Jinan

  I hope for your sake that's not your real name. Don't ever put your real name on these sites.

  Boo! 25 Jul 2009, 04:01 - Report